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You’ve got to hand it to Kamala Harris. Before ascending to the tippy-top of presidential politics, she knew how to suck up to the right people in order to climb the greasy pole of Willie Brown’s San Francisco Democratic political machine, all while finding the time to occasionally relax and smoke some marijuana-filled pipe.

In all seriousness, Kamala Harris truly offers a gold-mine of material for her political opposition. So far, Republican attacks on Kamala Harris have been all over the place. Here’s where they should begin:

Harris is a dangerous charlatan who worked her way to the top as an immigrant daughter of privilege who took advantage of affirmative action programs reserved for black American descendants of slaves before becoming the mistress of a top San Francisco politician who appointed her to a plum position at a government make-work job. Now, she is on the brink of taking her “ditzy floozy turned ruthless prosecutor” act to the highest office in the land as the willing figurehead of a totalitarian power-grab by the anti-white woke left.

Kamala’s life begins with what is, essentially, stolen valor against black Americans. Harris’s father was a Stanford economics professor from Jamaica. Her mother was a privileged Brahmin from India and a PhD-holding cancer researcher.

By any objective measure, Harris was a child of privilege in America. Inexplicably, her career was kick-started by affirmative action. An article from UC Hastings Law describes Harris as the direct beneficiary of a program intended for the “disadvantaged.”

UC Hastings Law:

For 50 years, the Legal Education Opportunity Program has made law school accessible for disadvantaged students.

LEOP offers admission to approximately 50 high-achieving students each year—up to 20 percent of the class—who have experienced major life hurdles, such as educational disadvantage, economic hardship, or disability. The majority are students of color. Besides traditional admissions criteria, such as grades and LSAT scores, the program also considers students’ overall potential and the obstacles they’ve overcome.

LEOP went on to count many prominent alumni among its ranks, including U.S. Senator Kamala Harris ’89.

Despite being an affirmative-action graduate of a low-ranked law school, Harris enjoyed a meteoric career trajectory thanks to her relationship as the floozy girlfriend of a married man. According to USA Today, former San Francisco Mayor Willie Brown would often travel to parties with his wife on one hand and a girlfriend on the other.

USA Today:

Former San Francisco Mayor Willie Brown addressed his past relationship with Sen. Kamala Harris in a letter to the San Francisco Chronicle on Saturday and acknowledged giving her appointments that furthered her career.

“Yes, we dated. It was more than 20 years ago,” wrote Brown, who said he had “been peppered with calls from the national media about my ‘relationship’ with Kamala Harris, particularly since it became obvious that she was going to run for president.”

Harris’ office did not immediately respond to USA TODAY’s request for comment on Brown’s letter to the Chronicle.

Brown was married at the time he and Harris dated, but – because he had been “estranged from his wife” Blanche Brown since 1981, according to People magazine –the relationship was not kept secret. A Sacramento Bee reporter told People that Brown “had a succession of girlfriends” and would “go to a party with his wife on one arm and his girlfriend on the other.”

A 1994 Los Angeles Times report about then-California Assembly Speaker Brown’s “rush to hand out patronage jobs” described Harris as Brown’s “frequent companion” and said several people referred to her as Brown’s girlfriend. That report also cited a column from the Chronicle’s Herb Caen that called Harris “the Speaker’s new steady.” When they met, she was 29 and Brown was 60.

According to Caen, the couple split up in 1995, which “flabbergasted” those “who found Kamala the perfect antidote to whatever playboy tendencies still reside in the mayor-elect’s jaunty persona.”

Although Brown supported Harris in her successful 2003 run for San Francisco district attorney, she tried to distance herself from him in that race, telling SF Weekly that Brown – whose career was dogged by corruption allegations – was an “albatross hanging around my neck.”

“His career is over; I will be alive and kicking for the next 40 years. I do not owe him a thing,” she told SF Weekly, vowing, “If there is corruption, it will be prosecuted.”

Among the issues that followed Harris from her time with Brown was the allegation of cronyism in his appointment of her to two well-paying posts.

“Yes, I may have influenced her career by appointing her to two state commissions when I was Assembly speaker,” Brown wrote Saturday. Brown was the speaker from 1980 to 1995, prior to his stint as San Francisco mayor.

Truly, San Francisco serves as a shining beacon of tolerant and progressive morality that enlightens the conscience of America.

In 1994, when Brown was 60 and Harris was 29, Brown appointed Harris to the Unemployment Insurance Appeals Board, which paid $97,000 a year ($170,000 in today’s dollars). Just six months later, Harris left that job when Brown appointed her to the California Medical Assistance Commission. That job paid a mere $72,000 a year ($126,000 in today’s dollars), but it was a patronage position that required barely any work.

Los Angeles Times:

The California Medical Assistance Commission, established during Gov. Jerry Brown’s tenure, meets monthly and is not seen as a full-time post. It is responsible for negotiating contracts on behalf of the state with hospitals to limit Medi-Cal costs.

In other words, at 30 years old, Harris’s sexagenarian boyfriend handed her a six-figure (in today’s money) part-time job that required attending one meeting a month. Oh, and he also gave her a BMW.

SF Weekly:

On the night of the Central Committee vote, a reporter for the Bay Guardian, which has vociferously criticized Harris for her association with Brown, stands staring outside the State Building as Harris drives off in a stylish black car. “Willie Brown gave her that BMW!” the scribe remarks with unconcealed disgust.

The reporter is about half right. In fact, as Harris later tells SF Weekly, the mayor gave her a 1994 BMW, which she traded in for the 1997 model she now drives. The car remains a tangible link to a man whom many San Franciscans associate with political chicanery and self-dealing.

Kamala Harris’ phoniness doesn’t end there. As California’s Attorney General, Kamala locked up almost 2,000 people for marijuana offenses. But that didn’t stop her from bragging about smoking marijuana and listening to Tupac in a sad attempt to pander to black Americans who actually descend from slaves during an appearance on “The Breakfast Club.”

Here’s a hilarious edit of all the times she cackled on the Breakfast Club, as an aside:


Stolen valor. Using sex to advance her career. Bragging about smoking marijuana. Did we mention her husband yet?

Just like Barack Obama, Harris has no ancestral connection to American slaves. However, unlike Obama, Harris has no ties to the black community by marriage, either. Her husband, Douglas Emhoff, is an entertainment lawyer who, according to his firm’s website, “represents large domestic and international corporations and some of today’s highest profile individuals and influencers in complex business, real estate and intellectual property litigation disputes.”

She has zero children and therefore no tangible, physical connection to the future of the nation.

Sorry I interrupted your Black Lives Matter party.

This is a totally groovy and hip to the struggle power couple, yo!

Some Republicans have tried to troll Kamala Harris with the left-wing progressive critique, “Kamala Harris is a cop.”

Archive link

Townhall, meanwhile, is repeating Tulsi Gabbard’s primary attack that Harris was too tough on criminals:

With rioters plundering every central business district from Manhattan Island to Manhattan, Kansas, it’s not a great idea to remind everyone that Kamala Harris put people in prison for breaking the law. But there is a way to sharpen this attack.

Americans like cops when they’re stopping looters and murderers. They don’t like shady or politically motivated ones. As attorney general of California, Harris used every shady, totalitarian tool in the book to pursue the left’s political agenda. She led the push to prosecute Exxon Mobil, claiming that the company’s dissenting view on global warming wasn’t simply a difference of opinion, but a form of securities fraud. She also led the prosecution of pro-life activist David Daleiden for his undercover videos exposing Planned Parenthood officials.

Let’s not besmirch our good police officers by calling Kamala Harris a “cop.” Kamala Harris is a calculating aspiring tyrant who wants to rip apart the First and Second Amendments.

Kamala Harris wants Twitter to ban President Donald Trump.

She also wants to seize your guns by means of an executive order. More specifically, she said that, as president, she would give Congress 100 days to pass strict gun control laws, or she would simply enact those laws by decree. One of Harris’ priorities: A mandatory buyback of semi-automatic “assault weapons.” Even Sloppy Joe Biden called that unconstitutional in one of the debates.

The Trump campaign has done well by labeling her “Phony Kamala Harris.” They would do even better to mine this rich vein much, much further.

Kamala may try her best to appear as a harmless and ditzy cackling floozy, but don’t be fooled by this act. She is not phony in the sense of being ineffectual and clueless. Kamala is a far more dangerous and sociopathic type of phony than that.

She’s a racial charlatan, who has taken advantage of racial set-asides for the descendants of American slaves when she herself is the privileged child of two foreign academics.

She’s a beneficiary of our fake meritocracy who accelerated her career by sleeping with a powerful married politician.

And as Joe Biden’s de facto president, she’d be a vicious tyrant with no moral center who would be willing to do anything to appease the left. She would happily indulge deadly race riots, confiscate guns from law-abiding citizens, and censor “hate speech” online. Kamala Harris is a dangerous phony who will do anything to weasel her way into power, and anything to keep it.